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Relationship Cheating can be a catalyst for Relationship Improvement

Relationship Cheating might feel like it’s everywhere, but experts have a hard time pinpointing exactly how many people cheat. It makes sense that nobody wants to be honest and own up to the fact that they do it.

“The general belief is that if a person is lying to their partner, why wouldn’t they also lie to a researcher?” says Anita Chlipala, LMFT, a dating and relationships expert. One expert we spoke to, estimated that 25% of men and 14% of women cheat in a lifetime; another said they thought it was between 20-60% of couples in a lifetime.

So it’s hard to say at this point how much it happens. Not to mention, most studies are done on heterosexual couples, so there’s a big subset of the population that’s not even being included in those estimates.

Definition of Relationship Cheating

Cheating or Not?

Cheating or Not?

Relationship Cheating also encompasses a spectrum of behaviors, and every couple has different definitions for what cheating really entails.

Open relationships, or sex outside of an otherwise monogamous relationship with the consent of both partners, is not cheating — by definition, cheating involves lying. Chlipala suspects that the number of people who cheat might actually be growing because of these flimsy definitions.

“One of the prime reasons why people cheat is because of opportunity and circumstance,” she says. “Now, people have access to dating apps, or they can reconnect with an old flame on Facebook. Some people are surprised that emotional cheating is actually a thing.” Many cheating scenarios start innocently and spiral, she adds. One survey found that 76% of women thought it was cheating to send flirty texts, compared to 59% of men.

Here’s a way to open the subject with your partner 🙂

Invite them to accompany you to this award-winning movie which is followed by a discussion with the producer, local actor Ben Mortley and two relationship counsellors, including myself Francess Day 🙂

It’s a topic every couple should be able to have a light-hearted conversation about.

Relationship Cheating trends

What we do know is that socioeconomic background matters, and affluent men are more likely to cheat, but the reverse is true for women, says Andrea Bonior, PhD, a clinical psychologist who specializes in relationships.

Chlipala says that she thinks infidelity can be contagious, and you’re more likely to do it if people around you are. In fact, research suggests that divorce could be contagious, so it’s not far-fetched to think affairs could work the same way.

“We derive social norms from looking around, so it’s reasonable that a group of friends who are being unfaithful to spouses would be more likely to consider that,” Bonior says. Even though your infidelity threshold could change, she adds that “norms are a powerful thing,” so you have to be careful about what you consider acceptable behavior.

Breathe a sigh of Relief

So, whether or not infidelity is actually a “part of life” for everyone, it’s pretty clear that the statistics aren’t quite there to back up that claim. We might have some insight into factors that affect someone’s likelihood to cheat, but it’s definitely not true or worth it to say that cheating is the norm — because, as far as we know, it’s not.

At Couple Counselling Perth, we will work with you to effectively help you and your partner resolve marriage, defacto, homosexual and/or other  relationship conflicts. Using Imago Therapy, Francess can help you learn how to empower yourself and your loved one to resolve your current, single or multiple conflicts. Find out more about Imago Therapy here Sometimes we may feel as though we have chosen a partner who isn’t very good at meeting some of our needs in life – even though there was something about them that caused us to fall head-over-heals in love with them in the first place. Counselling with Imago actually shows you how the things that, in the beginning, attracted us to the other person can become the source of conflict!

History Repeats itself!

Don’t we all know it! When you see and understand what aspects of your history you tend to recreate in your relationships YOU CAN TAKE CHARGE of your DESTINY. Couple Counselling will empower you both with these insights, and the skills to create the future way of relating which is giving and receiving the love you desire.

Are Special Occasions a disappointment?

Imago Therapy helps you discover how to surprise or make each other feel special in just the way that they need. Hopefully, you don’t save spoiling each other only for special occasions like this. We recommend spoiling each other at least monthly. You each will decide how much more often is needed for you. It doesn’t have to cost a lot of money either.

To learn more about Couple Counselling in Perth, call us on 0417 997 016 today. We’d love to hear from you!

Would you like to Communicate Better?

Learn Skills to help you Continue nurturing Love for each other throughout your Life. The most common issue which brings couples to counselling is a communication breakdown. In Mental Health week, our attention is brought to causes, prevention and cure. Mental Illness like depression and anxiety can occur when somebody is regularly not listened to, especially when they really feel the need. Imago teaches you a simple method to practice to improve your relationship communication with so many benefits. If it is not addressed soon enough, other problems as bad as an extra-marital affair can  occur. It is still possible to heal and strengthen the relationship after such hurt and pain, but it makes sense to get help long before such a traumatic form of communication occurs, don’t you agree!

You can read more about our Relationship Counselling on our Relationship Counselling Perth page. You may learn more about Francess on the Broadening Horizons website